It always seems like there’s such an exhaustive list of all the things wives should either be doing or not be doing, and truth be told, as a Christian, there kind of is. This doesn’t let men off the hook, and God certainly has a list for them too, but this article is for you.
There are so many things that can get in the way of a healthy marriage and it’s always good to focus on the ones that we can do something about. So let’s get started…
5 Things Christian Wives Should Stop Doing
While plenty of men have been known to do some serious nagging, this typically tends to be a wife issue. Even scripture says that it’s better to live on the corner of your roof, in a desert, or to listen to the constant dripping of rain, then it is to be inside with a nagging wife. Ok God, we get it.
But seriously, nagging is minimizing and rarely is received well. Instead of nagging, you want to be clear in communicating your expectations, asking for a detailed answer like “What time do you think you can have that done by?”, and if necessary explain how you feel about not being heard. No wife wants to be a mom to their husband and no husband wants their wife to be their mom. If you want to hear more on this, head here, The Truth about Nagging and Complaining.
This is a real easy trap to fall into. Women often feel like good multi-taskers, but the truth is, we’re not. In fact, no one is. We’re simply not designed that way. It’s not uncommon for a wife to yes herself to death. Maybe you do more than you should because you can get it done quicker or even better yourself, you don’t want to disappoint people, and quite frankly it sometimes just seems easier to say yes. Just remember that all those yeses include a no as well, and usually that no is what your husband gets. Be wise with your schedule and anything you put on your plate. The Enemy will have no problems with using your distractions for destruction.
Putting the kids first.
If you want to raise joy filled, strong, Jesus loving children, then the best thing you can do for them is show them who He is by modeling His love through your marriage. Your marriage is one of your best parenting tools and if you replace it or override it with so many extracurricular activities, and giving in to their every desire, they will miss out on the greatest opportunity to see Jesus in your family.
God. Husband. Kids. It needs to be that simple.
Withholding your needs.
Your husband is not a mind reader. He needs to hear from you and know where your heart, mind, and body is at. You are a human with needs, and as a mom and wife, you are not meant to only be in one-sided relationships. Be sure you’re taking the time to share where you’re at and what you need at this season of your life. He can’t meet a need he’s not aware of, and Jesus wants to use him as His hands and feet in your life. Let your husband in, and by doing so, you’ll prevent having to carry around a lot of resentment.
Expecting him to be your only resource.
While you want to go to your husband with your needs, you can’t rely on him to meet every one of them. He is a support for you, not a source of all your strength, peace, and joy. Despite what society says, only God can complete you. Only He knows every longing of your heart and every area of growth you need. Relying on your husband for all these things is putting him in a position where he is guaranteed failure. Share with your husband, but ultimately, find your fulfillment in the Lord.
As a Christian woman there is a higher calling on how you live your life.
While all these things are great for any marriage, they are especially true for you since you are representing Christ and wanting Him to be in the center of your marriage. All in all, do the best you can, keep your focus on Jesus, and leave lots of room for grace. If you want more on the topic of Christian marriage, be sure to go follow the Expedition Marriage podcast and check out the variety of topics.