Do you struggle with unmet expectations in your marriage? They sure are a funny thing, aren’t they? By now, you’d think we’ve all learned what expectations and assumptions get us—a whole lot of disappointment and frustration, and yet we still tend to have them.
On this final episode of the Communication Killers & their Kryptonite we discussed the deeper problems with Expectations and Assumptions, and shared how to navigate your way out of them.
The first struggle with expectations and assumptions is when we expect or assume these three things:
1. For your spouse to have common sense. Truly, common sense just isn’t a thing. It really feels as if it should be, however we can’t share common sense when we don’t share common experiences, upbringings, pains or traumas.
2. For your spouse to know what you need. You must communicate exactly what it is you want if you want a need met. Making vague or even frustrated statements does not express a need and quite often your spouse won’t hear what it is you’re asking for.
3. For you and your spouse to share communication styles. People share and receive things differently; your spouse is no different. Learning to understand if your spouse is concrete or non-concrete, or perhaps contemplative or non-contemplative, which help out your communication game greatly.
Stay tuned for the next episode where we’ll be talking all about sex! Just in time for Valentines Day!
Quotes from the episode:
“Common sense isn’t all that common because we didn’t all share common experiences.”
“The trash is full” does not mean “please take out the trash right now.” Ask for wat you need.”
1 Peter 3:8 NIV