Husbands often get a rap for being simple and uncomplicated, and while to a degree this is true, it doesn’t mean they don’t have a need for their wives to understand them. As strong and as put together as they may appear on the outside, they can actually quite often battle with inadequacy or the fear of being found out that they aren’t as great as everyone may think they are.
Husbands struggle with the fear of not being good enough as much as wives do.
As a wife, if you want to do your part to pour into the life of your husband, here are a few things they need to hear from you.
I believe in you—Your husband needs to know that you are behind him and that you are believing in him. They truly do care about how you feel about things and your belief in them is a big part of what propels them to do most of the things they do. Remind him of your support frequently.
It’s okay to take time for yourself—Many husbands often feel guilty over their desires to do some things on their own that they enjoy. More often than not, men don’t like sacrificing family time for free time, but just as it is necessary for you, it is also necessary for them to have this time—and your encouragement/permission, helps
them to de-stress in their fun and filling ways without feeling all of the guilt.
I appreciate your efforts—More than likely your husband works hard—and it’s also more than likely that their work often looks easy for them. But that doesn’t mean that it is. Sorry men, but you’re known for not revealing your feelings to your wives, so it’s not unlikely that your hubby has work stress that he’s not letting you see. He is probably dealing with some things that he doesn’t want to burden you with, so he keeps them to himself. Your reminder that all of his work efforts and provisions for the family will be much appreciated.
It’s okay that you failed—that doesn’t mean you are a failure. It’s a big deal for most husbands to be really hard on themselves when they mess up or miss the mark. In fact, the fear of failure often keeps many husbands from making bold moves that they would really love to make. Reminding them that their failures are ok and a necessary part of life and totally disconnected to who they are as a person, will go a long way.
I don’t hold the past against you—Wives, put down your scoreboards. Us wives are so good at remembering all.the.things, and it’s not uncommon for us to dump out that whole bag of past mistakes during every argument. Setting that scoreboard down will not only help your husband, it will also provide great freedom for you from carrying it all around. A husband who believes every mistake will be held over his head is a husband who will likely give up and quit trying, because he starts believing that no matter what he does, you will always find something to be unsatisfied with.
At the end of the day, your words hold power over your husband’s life. They can speak life and hope, or they can crush a spirit. A husband who feels believed in, empowered and courageous, is a husband who will impact his family greatly.
If you want to encourage your husband but don’t know the exact words to use, click the link below and get the simplified list of Sweet Things to Say to your Husband.
This is definitely great stuff I will help my husband and encourage him more. I hope in the future us wives need prayers too. Thank you!
We actually have a free 30 Day Praying for Your Wife challenge as well as one for praying for husbands! You can find them on our website!
We actually have a 30 Day Praying for Your Wife free challenge on our website. As well as one for the husbands.
I’ve tried this in the past many times, especially early on in our marriage because that’s what I was taught to do by watching other seasoned brides in my circle. Well, my husband would tell me that he already knows these things about himself and that I didn’t have to tell him what he already knows. So, I eventually stopped. And in case you were wondering, yes hearing his responses hurt deeply. And no, I don’t get affirmations from him either but here’s the kicker, I always hear him tell others affirmations like this. He says a person who loves themselves do not need validation from others.
Sorry for the late response! Just saw your comment. I would imagine hearing his response like that would be hurtful and I also imagine it hurts hearing him affirm others. Be sure you tell him that you do need affirmation. His statement is actually not true. We all need affirmations from one another. Scripture calls us to encourage one another and lift each other up. This is especially true in marriage.
I believe the Holy Spirit has had me to not even share with my husband that I’m doing this prayer for him!! I have shared certain scriptures with him but I think the Holy Spirit is telling me not to bring to my husband’s attention, any more than I already have, what I see as things he needs help with. My husband doesn’t need these 30 days of prayer to be about his short comings/down falls/where he can do better.
My husband stays away from any discussions about our relationship or
Marriage! He will not discuss anything. He has said hurtful things to me and when I try to tell him how it affects and hurts me he turns it around on me and starts getting really angry and dismisses how I feel. I am praying hard through it but todate I cannot feel comfortable to bring up any things that is affecting our marriage. I am trusting God to be still and no that He is the one who fight my battles and that He is so Able to change my husbands heart towards Him and me. I felt strongly and through God’s Words, that Love conquers ALL and this is how I am trying my best to show love even when I don’t feel to do it. I want to be obediant to God. Please help me tif there is more advice that I need to go through it and pray for Him to open up and be free to talk about his past and our problems. Thank you and God bless for the work you do.